“You have to grow from the inside out. None can teach you, none can make you spiritual. There is no other teacher but your own soul.”

Yes, I am the teacher to myself, rather Lord Shiva is the teacher to me. But I sometimes feel that Lord Shiva just don't even bother about me, that is it Lord Shiva who has taught me? am I assuming that Lord Shiva has taught me?

I have committed many many sins in my life that I feel that whether Lord Shiva even knows my name. I feel that Lord Shiva hates me. Yes, why shouldn't Shiva hate me? I have committed gravest sins, I am not having the right to think about lord, I have no right to any happiness in the world all my life, I should be sad always because I have committed so many sins.

Answer me for that reason lord, Say that you love me, say you care for me, answer me lord. Otherwise I will have to disbelieve in you.

But don't worry I am so strong that I can live with all the troubles and dangers. I am very strong, yes Very very Strong. Then I am very happy, now I am happy, always I will be happy.